Wednesday, April 09, 2008

MACYS-WHO GOES THERE? DOUBLE THE BLEECH!!! FOOL!

I missed last month. Was very busy & distracted in the most amazing way. Meaning I owe you a 'Double Bleech'!!! As I missed the ultimate Women's History Month, I cannot help but notice all the women who have made us look bad this year. Maybe this is why the celebration is only one month. I hope this will improve while i point out the huge mistakes these so called women have made!

1st of all the fact that Easter was last month & not after Passover or out the way it should be is just sick. This is what messing with our time change is doing! I don't even know if it's Daylight Savings time anymore because of this crap. To my dismay I didn't get my share of candy corn to drown in. [Oh well, maybe next yea
r!] But maybe this is why these women are just not giving us what they're supposed to. Once again, I DON'T TALK POLITICS! BUT! We're on our way to possibly having the 1st Woman President ever & everybody is blowing it for her. Even maybe her. I would like to see this happen, alot don't. Because of her man? Because of her views? Or because she's a chick? What do YOU think?? There has never or will there ever be any kind of candidacy like this. it wll be a miracle if it is. But if it turns out the way it seems to be going, than it will all have been for nothing. So maybe we can get with it & give this woman a chance to show what she has & not her man or what he did & the idiots who may have ruined this for her.

Take Spritzer's little chick. Who now! Just because she gave him a good old time for a hell of alot of dough, is on her way to becoming the exact version of what that 'profession' is supposed to mean. Now everyone is after her, maybe even Spritzer wants her back [on her back....]& hopefully he will & get her out of our sight, where she belongs. But will that happen?? NOOOOOOOOOO!! THE WHORRRRRRRORERRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Those Spicy chicks got back together to lipsync for 2 seconds & nobody saw it or noticed so who cares
& why?????
I think you may know the rest of these dumb...I don't know what to call them because they're certainly not women or ladys. The last one on the list is the only undeserving non-talent who actually got inducted into the Rock'n'Roll Hall of Fame. I don't care what the little dork said in his induction speech about the ones who didn't believe in her. After 25 years I'm still waiting for her to do a RECORD!!! Something decent-anything that didn't sound the same as everything she has ever done. The only thing that changed about her in her 25 year career is her hair color. Yet she's still blonde! SO THIS IS DESERVING OF AN AWARD? THAT HAS YET
TO BE GIVEN TO: HEART, THE RUNAWAYS, ISIS, BIRTHA, GOLDIE & THE GINGERBREADS, SHE, THE SHAGGS, WANDA JACKSON, LINDA RONSTADT, SISTER ROSETTA THARPE, DOLLY PARTON........DO I HAVE TO GO ON?????
Ladys who actually play instruments. In her speech she actually had the gaul to say that she was a drummer, at which point I could see Sandy West & Karen Carpenter rolling in their graves [& something worse-Don Henley smiling somewhere! ugh! you bum!]. 25 years of making the same damn record with machines & maybe a few real instruments & it gets an achievement award, which is what it is supposed to be. We know by now the
meaning of which has been lost on the idiot Rolling Stone voters of this particular award. A supposed rock magazine that has only 2 pages left to it & somebody is still reading this crap! So who is going to get in next year? I don't know if I even want to know. But as always, somehow somewhere, someway...there is hope..............

Now a salute, a tribute, an honorable mention to the real ladys who this year will save our history!:
1. BONNIE TYLER: Finally will return to America after 20 years to tour & show these horrendous
American Idle girls how to really sing!!!
2. LITA FORD: The Queen of metal is poising to return to the road after siring 2 boys! Which is probably the most insane concept ever concocted for those who do not know the Lita of yesteryear. Yet we know she will not disappoint!
3. BLONDIE: After having the nerve to call her last tour 'the Farewell tour', that they would never play again, something that seems to be on fashion now! Debbie Harry & her boys are touring for an album they released 30 years ago. The Parallel Lines 30th Anniversary Tour. Crazy! & that's what we need. Let's hope they actually feel like playing the entire album unlike the pieces of what Heart did to
Dreamboat Annie.
4. the DIXIE CHICKS: Have done a duet with Neil Diamond! What else is there to say??????????
5. SHELBY LYNNE: Her tribute to Dusty Springfield is nothing short of brilliant!
6. WOMEN'S MURDER CLUB: This amazing new TV show is finally returning after that dumb strike!


Pt. 2: MACYS WHY???

I still want Easter & I will have it. On April 20th, the day it should always be! And here's my Easter Happy Bunny! Aww, so it's not so cute. I think it is. I recently got a gift certificate to the legendary Macys, which I thought was pretty cool. I haven't used it yet. Then I realized what could I possibly want there? So i went to look. I also realized I had not been there in quite sometime. Actually perhaps not at all. So I was quite shocked to find out what I wanted to find I couldn't find, in a place I'm supposed to find everything.

Spontaneous-ism should be the most adventurous thing in the world. When you do something without thought but is quite fulfilling. I have very eclectic tastes when it comes to shopping. Something I rarely do only for music. Clothes are a whole other story. Shoes as well. I can admit & proudly I wear things till they wear out, not till their name falls off or only wear it once & throw it away, which I'll never understand. But then again I absolutely do not wear anything with anyone's name on it unless it's a band. Or get a shoe that has a heel on it the size of a toothpick. I need a little more action. So I decided with this little certificate to buy me a little dress. Simple right? Apparently for some this is hard, for me this has never been hard. EVER! Only till I went to MACYS.

Either I haven't stepped foot in there in a long time or I had an aneurysm in discovering how women's taste in clothing has changed. I swore this was my belated April Fool's joke. I was floored. Not only at how, not even hideous some of these colors & looks were, with the remedial brand name plastered all over the dress, ruining whatever look it was supposed to achieve, the effect which even made the poor mannequin sorry it was wearing the thing for dear life. Not only at how many hundreds of women were there shopping & actually admiring these strange prints. Not only how hugely filled the entire place was of all these insane looking clothes, but the fact. The mere fact!! That I don't think I understood any of these dresses at all. I never thought I would need a instructions, a manual, let alone a dictionary that explained to me how & why these dresses were 1: looked that way 2. somehow were going to make me look good & 3. how much I'd actually have to mortgage to try to take these anvils home. I did not find 'the look' I wanted, which at one time was simple: 'Simple': the one dress i saw looked like a blanket. Weird, which is always cool but 'Weird': was unexplainable in another case where it was just ugly; which made me think of a great quote from the Great Muppet Caper in which fashion designer Lady Holiday is appalled at her own creations at one point stating "too many frills we're not striving for the fan-tail pigeon look". Strange usually does the trick but 'Strange' : came in about more colors than I think i have ever seen in a dress, only one! I guess it just couldn't decide which one. Maybe my fashionista skills are in need of some slut tooling but I seriously doubt it. I think I have a great style and just not where that is 'at'.

I was quite frightened. I spent almost 3 hours in a store which has everything that is nothing. Or once was. That was disappointing. But I still have my little gift & I will use it. At one point the shoes scared me [& what's with...you call that jewelry??? what are you on???]. So yes I will go back, but not without protection for fear that one of the dresses may eat me alive.

HAPPY EASTER.........BUNNY......
XOXOXOXOX ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

1 comment:

Angell said...

ROOOOOOOOZZZZZIIIEEEE!!

Missed yer rant last month woman.

Totally agree with you on the whole women who are making our gender look ridiculous. And thankfully a few of the hottest women around can show these wanna-be's exactly how to become a legend without sacrificing quality.

As for fashion, and Macy's - ewwww. Honey, I have no fashion sense. Not according to Cosmo anyway.....I keep looking at what's new these days and all I can think of is - Wow, looks like god awful and ugly are the styles this season.

On a positive note, I will be seeing Da Boyz in their latest forray with Def and REO on Sunday. I CAN'T WAIT. :D

HUGS to you guys - and when are you going to release a gig schedule so I can talk the hubby into a much needed road trip?