Wednesday, April 22, 2009

DOUBLE BLEECH!!...APRIL DORKS!!. MARCH MADNESS???........


March came & went, not without incident. But for this month's Double Bleech, I decided to start with April since it's here already. Finally, Easter was on time, still a bit early but just as well. More confusion, more 'setting the clock back' stupidity & messing with Mama Nature [who's getting really pissed already!, especially since it's her BEarth Day!!! ], just craziness. Baseball was back in the form of the World Baseball Classic which was the craziest thing I'd ever seen in my life [in March] & I love baseball & 2 new stadiums opened in NY [& everywhere else...but who cares! I'm a NYker!!] in April. Trying to get in there was probably the harder than travelling to the World Classic itself. Ticketscummers are crawling in their spew just hoping to take us down with them & losing which is a good thing to find out that we're just not going to take their crap anymore. And despite it being unusually quiet, Happy Bunny has given me the greatest Easter of my life!!! < style="font-weight: bold;">John Cougar [ I will never call him Mellencrap, its too easy!!!]. Still the gods of TV have decided to completely annoy us more with a show based on what 'they' call [who??? dammit because they need to be shot!!] an older woman looking to date a kid!!! That in itself is a double bleech for me. OK, so maybe I'm near that age [although I'm not quite sure what their cut-off cougar date is but I don't really want to for any reason], but never have I ever, nor will I ever want or aspire to be even seen near a child unless it is under 5 years old & in no way will I want to date it [& you cougars will realize they are only 5 years old anyway...]!!!!

The ladys are out, they are free, they're independent & can see & choose whom they want. Fine. But mercy! How young do you want to go? Mind you, I will never watch this show & I don't even want to know, but if there isn't a kid over 25, there is no point. Don't you ladys realize men don't become men till at least 40 & don't even get brains till maybe 35 & I'm trying to being nice, which is not my best trait & is not what this bleech is for. 1st of all, ladys, do you really want to be teachers? I don't. I only do in music, nothing else. If you have to mold your little boy into shape fine, but its not a sport I feel like taking on. I'm sure it'll be massively fun for you, then when you hit the age they realize they will be disturbed by no matter how hot you look, they will take their education
elsewhere, if need be. There is a reason we're not all still in kindergarden. [Ugh, the thought....bleech, bleech....bleech..]

2nd: If you want a serious relationship & are truly looking for a mature kid [do those 2 words even go together?], Good luck! I have nothing to say about that. I have yet to meet a mature kid, except maybe hackers. But then that's is so what I'm not looking for [in their language]. 3rd: Language!!! OK maybe he'll make you feel young, but do you reallly want to listen to High School Musical for the rest of your life?????????? Will that be a 'Classic' in 20 years? Can you share that while walking him home from the prom? You'll start talking that way & Twittering, ugh! Do you realize this is illegal in some states??????????? I guess not anymore....I'd up the age limit on that! If you're not careful you'll wind up with someone like Matthew McConauhey & he's not even 40 yet
, get my drift [loon]!

Ladys, Cougars, whatever the hell you call yourselves. There are as of this writing, amazing available much more mature men than you realize. If you think this may be your last resort. Please reconsider. Mel Gibson is getting divorced. Hello??? He's gorgeous, older & psycho, what more could you want??? Harrison Ford! He's still not married, so there still may be a chance [besides, how can he possibly find that girl he's with now when she's so t
iny?] Alan Rickman, Bill Nighy, need I go on???? Men are where it's at. Real men!!! Believe me they still have something left!

Crazy controversial topic I know [big deal!], but it's funny. If you cougars want to be draggin your boy toy around by a leash watvhing American Idol, that's ok, I need a little more action in my life.

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MARCH MADNESS......

March is Women's History Month & they did it again. With the announcement that little Dakota Fanning will be playing wet & wild Cherie Currie in the new movie about the female rock band the Runaways.

OK, so I guess the premise is that she is the right age for the role, since Cherie herself was 16 when they hit. Yet we have yet to see this little actress really show herself. Dakota has done amazing things & she seems to have the talent to play this role. This may be a very challenging since she is going to have to 'do mounds of cocaine', 'sing', 'sleep with almost everyone in sight' & 'get clean' all tasks for Oscar actresses. Depending if the writers of the movie get this right.

Miss 'Twilight' is going to play Joan Jett. We have no idea who they will get for Lita Ford, Jackie Fox & the great powerhouse Sandy West. Yet let's make this clear. The movie is about & based on Cherie's book 'Neon Angels' so basically it's about her & not just the Runaways. But I'm putting my votes in for who I'd like to see play the rest of the 3 since it hasn't been announced & since age may be a factor, all of a sudden [remember kiddies: Olivia Newton John was 30 years old when she played 16 year old Sandy Olsen]

Yes, I'm going to say it. I want Miley Cyrus & Hilary Duff to play Lita Ford & Sandy West. Either Or!!!!!! They're both blonde, young, & wanna be crazy. I'm actually casting Miley to be Sandy since she's a giant. It could be the out she's looking for, since we all know she wants to be crazy. Who knows how Dakota will take on Cherie, but Lita & Sandy? That would be insane & quite fun.

I'd like to see Eliza Dushku or Mena Suvari for Jackie. I don't care how old they are. They both should be Joan Jett as well. But that's already gone. it would be an interesting cast. I think Malcolm McDowell should play scumbag Kim Fowley. he's sort of a dead ringer & would be quite scary. I just can't imagine how crazy this movie will be but I can't wait. Should we cast the GO-GO'S movie yet??? [this was supposed to happen already but no one knows what happened to that].
I would also hope they put a good REAL band together for this & that these girls make the effort to learn their instruments instead of just play-synching. But that is just a dream isn't it???? This is my only hope!!!

That really wasn't the big March story but it is interesting. Movies aren't what they used to be. Yet what they're doing now is outrageous. Let's hope we get more good rock movies. This one takes the cake!!

xoxxoxooxRozzie
see ya in May-Maybe......