HALLOWEENIE AFTERTHOUGHT!

Hello fellow loony bins. It's been a while since I posted. Unfortunately, 'MySpace' has taken up more of my time, which really sucks. I never wanted to go there. But it sucks how much fun it is. [It seems to be a kiddie site & sort of a dangerous one as well. But what's a little nutty site to an old lady like me.] Hee hee! Whatever. I have a few things to discuss. I sort of missed Halloweenie & I'm very upset about it. But I did manage to have some fun that night. But I still want my candy. Tried to dress up like a dude. It was so regular it was boring. I probably looked like the biggest dork in history. [If I were to eye myself as a dude, I wouldn't give me a 2nd glance. I wasn't even my type.] But I have to say it felt strange. But it wasn't easy. I need a better suit next time. Silliness.

Anyway, I usually have a fellow co-hort to help me with my blecch, but this time I thought I'd put up a real shot to show that this has just been on my mind for a while. Why? I don't know but I've been listening to what has been a constant run of this so I feel I have to get out what I need to about this. I guess Dennis seems to have a thing for duets now...

DUETS! Once again, it's about duets. OK I saw the show maybe twice. Twice only because our celebrated boy-the legendary Dennis DeYoung was on there singing with a comedian /actor. NOT DUETing as it was so well put when the Celebrity Duets show aired. As I stated on my dumb 'myspace' page, it WASN'T A DUET. The participants [the 'so-called' celebrities] were singing background for the actual real singers that were asked to be on the show. GOT IT! ARE WE CLEAR ON THIS YET??? A DUET IS A SONG SUNG BY 2 PEOPLE AT DIFFERENT SEQUENCES! NOT IN UNISON OR BACK-UP SINGING. Otherwise every Pink Floyd song with the ladys would be a duet & that is NOT correct.

Anyway why this has been bugging me is insane. [This is a potentially amazing Halloween story. SO if you missed Halloween because of something dumb like work too, then please keep reading.] Since that show ended, which I didn't see the ending or even care, [since poor Hal Sparks got thrown out just for making his song a little rockin'] for some reason, all the songs I've come across since, have been duets. Some especially bad. But , yes, all duets. And my beautiful new channel THE TUBE isn't helping by playing some of these extremely awful ones over & over [even though they are doing this I still emplore you to find this channel because it is still amazing!]. Sick. SO I kept listening, observing & as bad as that show was [with the very exception of our Dennis!], there have been worse duets. And of course I couldn't get it out of my brain without telling you about it. So here it goes. The Best Duets EVER, the WORST of course, & best uses of a non-duet, which I will explain.

Now since this has been imbedded into my head forever. I should start with the explanation of the word DUO which is another word no one seems to realize it's correct meaning either. Now the reason being the award complex. The award shows always seem to want to award a 'duo or group' & together, like if it were it's own band, they'll never think of separating it, right? So what is a duo? It 's 2 people, right? Less than 3, less than 5, not more than 2. But who always wins??....the group award...?? ...the duo??? Apparently being a giant group is too much to make up more than 2 awards for. Jag-offs!! Oh well, not that I have anything against duos, but they don't belong in that category. It should be separate & they should get up off their asses & make up more awards for the musicians who really deserve it. I'm rambling now, but who cares. Maybe someone will listen.
Then you have your duet bands. Hall & Oates, Air Supply, Dave & Sugar [remember them? if not, too bad!],Sonny & Cher, almost all their songs are duets, which is fine, some aren't but they still rock. But even they know what a duet constitutes!

[Wow, this thing is turning out to be longer than I thought, back to the dumb show] So the show was trying to make duets out if songs that had no business being a duet. So they meant to destroy perfectly good songs by having a good singer sing with a bad singer , put it together & you had a duet. [whoever thought of this needs to be tied to the end of an anvil....oh..., it was you Simon Idol dork]. So very few have gotten away with making a habit out of this. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. The only time it worked was when Kenny Rogers the duet master-called...of all people.. Sheena Easton to turn a Bob Seger song that wasn't ever a duet 'We've Got Tonight' into a duet. That actually worked. It's not going to work again!! [Maybe it has I'm just not remembering-write me dammit!]

Anyway, I think I said everything I wanted to say about this. Here are the best duets ever, just because of their sheer power, emotion, excitement, fun-ness & just sheer class!

1.Don't Fall In Love With A Dreamer-Kenny Rogers & Kim Carnes [if this doesn't rip your guts out, you have no feeling]
2.You Don't Bring Me Flowers-Barbra Streisand & Neil Diamond [a song born out of 1 song each sung separately, geniusly brought together]
3.Where The Wild Roses Grow-Nick Cave & Kylie Minogue [nice & spooky]
4.Summer Nights-Olivia Newton-John & John Travolta [Classic]
5.Sweet Fire of Love-Robbie Robertson & U2 [this song is just sick!]
6.Don't Cry Daddy- Lisa Marie Presley & Elvis Presley [Too Awesome!]
7.The Core-Eric Clapton & Marcy Levy [he has never made another duet this great!]
8.Heaven Knows-Donna Summer & Brooklyn Dreams [Brutal!]
9.No More Tears-Barbra Streisand & Donna Summer [the 11 minute version is the best!]
10.It's Only Love-Bryan Adams & Tina Turner [it's just loud...the live version's BETTER!!!]


Here are the WORST...well...becasue they're just bad:
1.Picture-Sheryl Crow & Kid Rock [they sound like they want to be put to sleep & should!]
2.Tearing Us Apart-Tina Turner & Eric Clapton [the worst unfeeling duet song ever]
3.I Guess That's Why They Call It The Blues-Elton John & Mary J. Blige [do I have to explain?]
4.I'll Be There-Mariah Carey & whoever..........
5.Ridin' With The King-Eric Clapton & BB KING [clearly Crapton has no clue how to sing with anyone but himself]
6.Across The Universe-Moby, Rufus Wainright & some other child [UGH! a triple crap!]
7.Comfortably Numb- Van Morrison & the BAND [2 amazing talents come together to destroy a song with the help of the writer!]
8.I'll Be Missing You-Sting & P.Diddy [even Andy Summers hates this!]
9.I Got You Under My Skin-Bono & Frank Sinatra [he was dead when he did this right?-Lucky.]
10.Crusin'-Gwenyth Paltrow & Huey Lewis [the movie was good but c'mon]

There's my rant. I could ask also if a person sings one line of a song with someone else, does that count as a duet???? [i.e.: Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough-Patty & Henley, etc.....]

What Musical Instrument Are You?
Drum Kit Technically not really a musical instrument, but vital nontheless. You're in many ways the backbone or the rock of the group. You keep things steady and on track. You make a lot of noise, but it often sounds very cool. Try not to keep people up at night. Now if only you could actually read music...
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