BLUE MOON????????????????????

I loved science. Science is supposed to search, discover, answer & maybe cure some of life's weird questions & mysteries. My favorite of all the parts of science to learn was the Table of Elements. I knew it like I know my music. It was fun, it was interesting. I would've become a chemist! Yet lately with all this cloning & weirdo claims that certain scientists are spewing lately, you just think these people are seriously losing their minds. I've been questioning my love for science. Wondering if the real culprits of this are the scientists who have certain beliefs that don't quite match my own. I'd give anything to see what is actually in space myself. I still love space & wonder what's up there, but not to the point of practically destroying the Earth to find out. [maybe certain parts! but not the whole Earth...] I most especially not willing to destroy what's practically left of whatever it is that is up there to find out. Of course some idiots at NASA are!

NASA who may have been cool once, just isn't anymore. Why else would we have
Summer on Christmas & Winter in June? How they get this money is beyond me. Grants, loans, donations? Fine. Huge islands of food can be bought with all the money they spend sending rockets up to space to find out what's up there. It used to be interesting. Now it's getting to the point where it's just ridiculous. On Friday, October 9th at approximately 7:30am Eastern Standard Time, these loons sent up a rocket which was described as the 'size of a bus'... A BUS!!!!!!!!!!! This bus was called the Lunar Crater Observation & Sensing Satellite. SO they sent this huge bus crashing into the moon. THE MOON!!! What has the moon ever done to them??????? It didn't stop in space to look at it, it didn't take pictures of anything. It BLEW A HOLE IN THE MOON THE SIZE OF A BUS!!!!!!! OK! FOR WHAT???? To see if there is water there.

The loon in charge of this wanted to determine if there is water ice hidden in the crater's perpetual darkness & frigidness. This will determine if NASA will go back & destroy the rest of it next year! Or destroy another planet. This has apparently cost us something in the neighborhood of $79 million dollars. A small fortune just to bomb the moon. This is what some are calling it. I call it an assassination. That is exactly what is it since essentially NASA decided to shove a huge bus up the moon's ass! Now no evidence has been found that life is on any planet let alone this one [especially Earth!], but what would've happened if there was life on the moon? I'm sure [or I doubt!] all necessary precautions were taken: like the entire moon exploding on impact & us never seeing it again; Like debris falling on us or anywhere. The moon is far far away but who knows when something could come flying out of the sky & on top of your head!!!!!!! Like part of the moon just getting sawed in half by this giant bus coming towards it. Think about this! Just imagine if you were the moon.... wouldn't you want to kick a little NASA ass??? This gives new meaning to the Dark Side of The Moon!!!!!!

I have to admit since that happened I did not see the moon for 2 weeks & I was sick about it the whole time. Afraid, scared, wondering where it was & what they did to it. NASA swore it would still be there & nothing would happen to it. Oh really & we're supposed to believe you? Oh such smart & expert loons on spending money for idiotic reasons. If the moon had something on it that could possibly cure a disease, I still can't see how destroying half of it could possibly help us in any way. Except for NASA to get more money to make more giant buses to send up planet's asses! Yes I have to be graphic because this is serious. They are messing with our air, space & livelihood & it has to stop. Experiments were cool when you had the formula in your hand for a cool mini volcano to explode in class & hope the teacher would lose their minds while they were full of dirt & lava! But this has gone way too far. I wonder if the NASA loons were there going 'Cool man, alright!! dude!'. Bums!!

It's done, they found what they wanted. At least 25 gallons of water was found on the moon. Now what? Do we get to drink this water? Are they going to go bring some back for us to improve our water? Or are they just going to keep blowing shit up till they destroy the Earth? I just wonder if something on the moon isn't plotting revenge right now for their stupidity. I did finally spot the moon, it was a quarter moon, the night the Yankees won the World Series. I was looking out the window to hear everyone outside celebrating the win & I look right above me in space & there it was. Slightly still in tact. Smiling as if didn't know what hit 'em. Poor thing.

BEST MOON SONGS EVER!!!!!

1.WOMAN IN THE MOON-BARBRA STREISAND
2. SISTERS OF THE MOON-FLEETWOOD MAC
3.DESERT MOON-DENNIS DEYOUNG!!
4.DANCING WITH THE MOONLIT KNIGHT-GENESIS
5. WALKING ON THE MOON-THE POLICE
6.UNDER A RAGING MOON-ROGER DALTREY
[if the moon was actually pissed this is the song he'd sing!!]
7. NEW MOON ON MONDAY-DURAN DURAN
8.MOONLIGHT FEELS RIGHT-STARBUCK
9.MOONAGE DAYDREAM-DAVID BOWIE
10. MOONDANCE-VAN MORRISON

AUGUST.... SEPTEMBER....DOUBLE HEADER....

WHERE DOES THE TIME GO??

It seems I am neglecting my duties of keeping you up to date as to how stupid this world can be. Whether it'd be musically, which is my specialty or just life in general. The time really has flown by, it's outrageous. But of course, I can honestly say there is no shortage of stupidity in this land or the world by the way. Happy Bunny has always been by my side & it continues to do so [since we're still not sure what gender happy is, I shall respect it's privacy...] by popular demand...[thanx Miss Angell!xoxox] In the last 3 months that I've missed I shall attempt to inform you of how utterly stupid this world has become........

AUGUST:WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE??????:
One event that was pretty important in August was the 30th Anniversary of Woodstock. Mud & acid is all you're thinking of course. But come on, almost everyone who went [excluding the musicians....] is probably still alive & probably does remember that they were there. Of course if no one has you on tape or has any pictures of you, this will never be proven unless you actually have dirt you saved up from there, then technically we can believe you. You could have also acquired a very special disease as well. A movie came out about it besides the actually re-release of the entire concert & the reunions that took place.

The movie is called Taking Woodstock, which shows how the event got started in the first place through the eyes of the farm owner's neighbor who owns a nearby hotel where the he decides to house the producers of the event. Its a very interesting movie that seems to bring back what the show was supposed to be about. Not what everyone thought it had become. What was it about?
Trying to have 3 days of peace & amazing rock'n'roll without anyone trying to harm or kill each other. It's as simple as that. So why is this fact still lost on some 'non-believers'? They just don't seem to want to believe that music, let alone rock'n'roll can do some good, even if the music isn't saying much. 40 years later, we're still talking about this event at Upstate NY. Years after Elvis shook 'it' on TV, we still talk about that. Still no one understands it.

Who is left that isn't understanding this? Old people who hate rock music?
Well guess what, old people don't exist because they're all rock stars now!! SO HA! Yuppies who refuse to believe that music existed before the 90s?? Well guess what, you dorks wouldn't even exist if it weren't for that night! Classical musicians who completely don't listen to that music at all?? Well guess what, there are more classically trained rock musicians in the world out there who play the stuff probably better than Tchaikovsky did. Children who will forever believe that the Jonas Brothers are the best rock band in the world?? I leave them alone because they will grow up eventually. The only sad thing about remembering this is that at least half of the artists that appeared are all gone. Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, 1/2 of the Who, Tim Hardin, a third of Canned Heat, a third of the Grateful Dead, Tom Fogerty-CCR, a third of Jefferson Airplane, 1/2 of the Band, Paul Butterfield, etc... How the audience survived is beyond me, the mud alone would've killed me, but the fact that they did & remember what they tried to do is a pretty nice memory. This wouldn't have happened without the music. That's something to always remember.

Which brings me to the reason for where the time went in August. While all the Woodstock celebration was going on, another little music movie made it's debut during all the acid reminiscing. Something called 'It Might Get Loud' came out in theatres somewhere for some reason. What's it about??? 3 Rock'n'Roll guitarists. OK. I thought I would like this, but the guitarists in question: Jimmy Page, the Edge & Jack White, just wasn't interesting. I might've been completely engrossed in this if the 3 had been Brian May, Trevor Rabin & Orianthi. Just a small tidbit of Jack White's interesting hooks & history was surprising, yet Jimmy & Edge just was uninteresting. This is totally backwards for me, since 'new music' doesn't appeal to me. I was looking for something classic. We lost Les Paul in the middle of all of this. Yet with how crazy I heard this man was, he did basically make all of our sounds, along with his wife Mary Ford. That would've made for a more interesting music guitar movie. Its not the size of the movie that counts but what's in it & I needed a little more action.



SEPTEMBER:IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY: SHUT UP!!!!:

MTV AWARDS!!! EMMYS?? WOW!!!, How long as it been since anyone has seen this show & how long since it has been good??? 1st question??? 20 years. 2nd question??? 30 Years. Has it been that long?? No one wants to know or care. Yet it has been that long since the show was worth watching. I LIVE for award shows. Depending IF our favorite is nominated. Grammys, Oscars, Golden Globes?? Whatever! Isn't that everyone's philosophy??? Shouldn't it be???, so what happened???
I neglected this show years ago, when I knew it was useless, apparently everyone else did to. Yet for some reason, I was forced![by my mom no less...fine! Her exact words: 'You never know what's gonna happen...' hello???] There's not a single person on the show I like, to say nothing of who my mom likes. What happened????

Micheal Jackson died. A tribute would be nice wouldn't it? And there was, by his sister Janet. She did their duet Scream, which if you listen to the lyrics still ring true to this day, quite eerily. A very cool tribute, something everyone should've been talking about for a long time after the show was on, because nothing else in that show was going to be good. Not Lady GooGoo & her wacko live Muppet outfits & bleeding performance,wishing she was Alice Cooper [I won't even mention the fact that she had the colossal nerve to have Kermit the Frog drive her there, how dare he!! Miss Piggy probably kicked his ass! ask Alice Cooper!] Not cool Pink's wild acrobatic performance, the only person on that show who actually sang. Not Joe Perry wimping out & performing with Katy Perry, a horrendous version of Queen's We Will Rock You, because 1-she's in love with Freddie & 2-because Perry 1 had nothing else better to do since he seems to blame Steven Tyler his supposed best friend of 40 years for the cancellation of their tour since they all besides Perry 1 himself had been injured in various medical ways....[it's a Styx thing.......]. Not Eminem returning after all these years [...big deal!], not Green Day schlepping their wives & kids to the event & still being slight punks [which was shocking to me....that they still existed...]. Not the bad host Russell Brand, who was actually funny for once & NO!!! NOT!! the FIRST COUNTRY ARTIST EVER TO WIN AN MTV AWARD!!!!& BEAT OUT A BUNCH OF TALENTLESS CHICKS!!

We remember this idiot coming up onstage trying to take Taylor Swift's very first award away. Pathetic. I don't think I want to even mention his name because I too am sick of him as everyone else should be. With all that, everyone is saying to forgive him. 'He' even made a asinine attempt to 'apologize' & ask for forgiveness. My personal favorite? Apparently the bum had written on his blog somewhere that when he received an award he didn't think he should have won, quote:
"I gave my awards to Outkast when they deserved it over me," he said, referring to the 2007 BET Awards, when he tried to give his trophy to the band.
OK. Let's see. What did he think would happen? Should Taylor have said 'You're right, here Beyonce, here's my award' ?? I just wish the million times he's done this before, someone had the guts to take the mike & just clock him on the head & tell him to Shut up! I just wish he would've pulled that off at the Country Music Awards. That would've been hilarious. 'He' previously got into it with John Rich of Big & Rich when Gretchen Wilson won Best New Artist at the 2004 Grammys saying she didn't deserve that one. Mr. Rich promptly replied by telling 'him' to 'Kiss his country ass!'. For that I give the above 'sculpture award' to the idiot!!

The MTV Awards were weird & slightly fun & depressing. But the EMMY Awards, were a nightmare. Maybe I'm not all into the new shows on TV & the cable shows getting popular now. I certainly hate the reality shows that just annoy. I must state first & foremost:NO ONE WATCHES TV TO SEE REAL PEOPLE!!! THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT!!! FAKE PEOPLE THAT'S WHERE IT'S AT!! OR IS IT??

The Emmys were extremely depressing. With the exception of the absolutely flying host Neil Patrick Harris, who actually made it fun. What was depressing is I had no clue who a single nominee was. That was quite frightening. I'm not a fan of TV lately, let alone the last 10 years, but that was ridiculous. I have always known at least who was nominated for the comedy shows at least. To no avail, it was just awful. I couldn't root for anyone since I didn't like any show. Aside from that, there were people there, they were happy for the winners & I was depressed. I don't like 30 Rock. I have no idea what Mad Men is. There was an award for reality show host which was just useless. I knew who more people were at the Daytime Emmys & I don't watch Soap Operas at all [only the one that counts GH!]. I don't even think That 70s Show, the only 'new' show I ever watched & probably the last, ever got nominated for an Emmy that I can remember. The scariest saddest part was I knew almost all the Tribute faces in the Memorial segment. That was scary. Farrah, Ed McMahon, Patrick Swayze, Walter Cronkite. It's a different world I guess. But it's not the same. It's one thing I'll never accept, yet I hope something amazing will bring back what I used to know as good TV.

I'm not old & stiff. Just realistic to what's missing. Good TV!! Maybe for a few seconds I got it watching the sucky MTV Awards. That's how bad TV is.....I'm just really afraid to see the Grammys now.........

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

DOUBLE-WHAMMY....... RAIN RAIN DON'T GO AWAY.....IT'S NOT THAT DIRTY.....JUST BAD.....!

RAIN RAIN DON'T GO AWAY..............

Do June showers bring July rain???? It seems to in this town. It also seems that it's not just here that it's raining. We're hardly having normal baseball because of this. Yet everyone is depressed, sad, wet. Why? Because of the rain. It has rained more in these few months than it has for the past 5 years. Summer clocked in on June 20th, 2009. Not a day over 80 degrees had been clocked yet. Rain,rain, rain has continued since then & it started when? In April, when the proper 'showers/flowers' saying is apropos. [??]
Did May bring the roses? Nope! More rain. Everyone is sick of it. Nothing can be done. No one can go anywhere, it sucks. Let's talk about rain shall we? Happy Bunny & I seem to have an affinity for days like this. Yes, it may be depressing , it may be bleech....but for my latest double whammy BLEECH here, I think I'll start with rain & end with some dirt.... look out, the July version later may not be for all the kiddies. There's my warning. That's all you're getting. But it'll still be fun if you wish to read it......

I used to hate the rain. Wearing a giant plastic bag over you is so not sexy. But tell me, who really has to go out in the rain? You don't have to. AT ALL! If you don't want to. Unless: 1: You work...2: You're stuck somewhere & suddenly get caught in it.... or 3: You are just insane! For drivers are told it is NEVER good to drive because of slippery roads or puddles or basically crashing into some other car you can't see because of the fog. Yet people do it anyway. Maybe not because they have to but they do. Of course work is always the catalyst. Yet what if you don't have to work. Do you stay home & avoid the wetness? Now there's that chance of a cold. Big deal. Take an Alka-Seltzer [Cold Medicine not the other death one!] & it's gone. Yes, I got the remedial allergy attack & it was hell for months, but this started in the winter. Yet when it came to the rain, if it wasn't extremely cold or dangerous, I found the rain lately to be quiet peaceful & as of late, extremely romantic.

One game the Yankees played under this crazy June rain actually did get played after a slight delay with the Mets in Shea Stadium. But not before the clouds above turned an eerie shot of blood red. It was the scariest sky you probably ever saw in your life. It would've sent any spacemen running. Or anyone else believing we'd been attacked by a nuclear cloud. Yet there was something beautiful about it. No one was afraid, no one moved or even cared. Everyone stayed, the game went on & so did this sky. It was as if the strangest sunset had just appeared, almost seeming like it just lost it's yellow color & just started to bleed in a very artsy way. It was one hell of a sight. The game has been aired since. You should try to check this out if you think you may ever see a sky like that again. For a minute I was afraid. There was no rain at that point, but it looked like some kind of warning. Though it seemed like it was just a higher power making a statement. What statement you say??? 'Not everything I do has to be yellow'! No. Oh well, but it was something special. Yet it has rained for almost 5 straight months. Summer seems to be here but I will tell you right now has not even started yet. It should start something before Halloween, when MAYBE we'll hit 90 degrees [& maybe winter will start next May, so break out the tanning lotion on Christmas!!].

I've been dreaming of the rain. If rain can be like it is in the movies, who wouldn't want to have it all the time? You're out with the one you love & suddenly get caught in the rain. You do want to get wet, in more ways than one. Its a beautiful feeling. The thunder has been louder than usual & there's something even more pleasant about that. Although it has it's danger [no one wants to get struck by lightning, this is when -yes- you should stay home & not be in a damn car, unless you are 'creative', inside joke kiddies...!-haha!]. You do dream of being on a beach & making love in the rain. It's a nice thought & if it's happened for you-good for you ! But rain isn't what it used to be when we were little & afraid.

I remember almost every song that would play everytime it would rain & I hated them all & I never wanted to hear them again because it scared me & I thought that everytime i'd hear it, it would rain. Never mind the dumb songs that have been written in tribute to rain, some of which are horrendous [do I have to name them? Riders on the Storm?? Come on!!!] . I could swear to you , everytime I would hear Nights In White Satin by the Moody Blues, it would always, always rain & guess when the thunder would come- just in time when he would start speaking: 'Breathe deep the gathering gloom'.... Though there is no mention of rain in this song whatsoever, it was the most frightening thing I'd ever been through in my life. I would cry & scream & freak. Not to mention the other songs that would always play in the rain, but that one was the main one that stuck out & that I remember. I also recall finally getting over this when I did finally hear that song & it didn't rain, when I saw the video. I still wasn't too convinced though. What did convince me was going to see the Moody Blues after finally falling in love with them, at an outside pier in concert. They played the song live & it didn't rain. I almost wished it had.

The 2 other fantastic rain experiences I've had have been at concerts. Getting completely soaked during a Steve Miller Band show at Jones Beach, NY was the most fun I've ever had in the rain. Steve had the gall to ask US!!! if he should stop. WE SAID NO!!!!!!!!! & he ROCKED!!! Then years later, seeing the great Sass Jordan sing live at the South Street Seaport. An outdoor show, where the band is always protected to a certain extent. Where you can see boats pass by & watch the sunset. She has a song called Pissin' Down, which isn't about rain either. Yet the minute she sang it, it began to rain & gave the song the perfect new meaning it should've had in the first place [it's an addiction song]. It drove me to tears, especially since she screams the chorus quite loudly with all her guts! Very inspiring & something I will never forget.

There is something special about rain. It tends to clear the roads & your head quite nicely. I remember when we were in a drought & didn't have any at all which was quite frightening as well. There are the awful songs that have since come out about the rain that I just have no use for. The rain is to be appreciated & it should have a proper song written for it so quit making up stupid ones just to mention the word 'rain' jerks! If you're with someone you love, look at the rain & try to go out, you will have fun. Looking at the rain & even hearing it on my window sill has given me a sense of peace I haven't felt in a long time. I will always welcome it, especially since it's been happening more often than normal lately [maybe because these space loons keep sending crap up there & screwing up or weather!] , the only time I don't welcome it is when it disrupts my Yankee game.

The 10 Best Rain Songs EVER!!!
1. One Rainy Wish-BRIAN MAY [it doesn't mention rain but it'll rip your guts off!]
2. Silvery Rain-OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN [WEIRD & GENIUS!]
3.Pissin' Down-SASS JORDAN [listen to it in the rain & die!, no rain lyric either.]
4. It Never Rains In Southern California/Moonlight Lady-ALBERT HAMMOND/JULIO IGLESIAS [2 different songs almost 20 years apart that were both written by Albert & pay tribute to each other, awesome!]
5. Lizzie & The Rain Man- TANYA TUCKER [crazy song about a dude who makes it rain somehow!]
6. Here Comes The Rain Again-EURYTHMICS [-just brutal!]
7. Summer Rain-BELINDA CARLISLE [very cool & sad...]
8. Laughter In The Rain-NEIL SEDAKA [yeah that's right! romantic!]
9. Kiss Me In The Rain-BARBRA STREISAND [she actually did this whole album -WET-1982 about rain & water, wild!]
10. It's Raining Again-SUPERTRAMP [a song I hated for years because of it's disturbing video, but it's perfect!]


bleech..........July....


ITS NOT THAT DIRTY...........JUST BAD....!.

So it's July & it's still raining. So what do you think I'm thinking about? Old Timer's Day!! & the Rain, together?? That makes for a good old time in my book! The Yankees had their annual celebration of past Yankee playing greats together for the yearly get together, where they reminisce & play the shortest game ever. WHy? Because half these guys are so old they can't play anymore, but they still are cool! This is a day I live for. A perfect man hunt. Hee hee. What do I care about these new Yanks, this is my day. I'm not an Old Timer yet but that's my favorite time of the year. As I love all Old Timers. They're so yummy & have more experience. Even though some of these boys are a little out of my league, its still a wonderful historic thing to watch. I had the worst seats ever but I got to see my beautiful Gene Michael! [my seat should've been on his lap!] Wow,he is still adorable after all these years. I wonder if he likes the rain... which brings me to my bleech point which is quite frisky.

I read something recently that had a list of the Worst Dirty Songs Ever. Dirty songs meaning that they either have suggestive lyrics about sex or mention sex in some hideously unpleasant way. Yet all the songs mentioned have only been released in the last 10 years. Meaning lately so-called 'new artists' or 'artists' as of late have taken to releasing the most crass, disturbing songs that have the most insane lyrics you could think of, to, of course, sell records. Records they seriously think are going to make ladys just run to these idiots, which of course, is a joke. Yet the problem with these songs is 1- the artists are so bad that it doesn't seem to matter who comes & goes as long as the song has what they think is 'something'; 2: the music is so bad that believe it or not NO ONE is actually listening at all to what they are dancing to or what they're singing if they can actually 3: Make out what some of these 'singers' are saying in these awful songs. So what is the problem??? The problem is radio or whoever is playing this crap is flooded with these 'kind' of songs & the parents are all freaking because only THEY are listening to the actual words & that's sad. Case in point: If You Seek Amy by Britney Spears which is probably the worst record ever & just adds to her worst collection of crap. It has a 'hidden meaning' if you haven't figured it out already it's supposed to mean f.u.c.k in full spelling. Stupidity right? This had already been done by a few rock bands so who cares, but of course, the parents can't have the kiddies listening to this. So they tried to get it banned. Only to have 1- fans buy it more 2- her make a 'clean' video for to hide the meaning 3-to just make her more famous. Sick!. I would've just banned it for being crap & not original, certainly not for that. But that's just me.

When Tipper Gore ran her stupidity that was the PMRC banning the worst songs on the planet. That is exactly what she did. She banned the worst songs on the planet that no one ever heard of until she told everyone about them. [ I still would like to know how the hell she got her hands on any W.A.S.P. record & there's no way in hell her kids were listening to them for shit!]. She threw down every stupid shenanigan ever for trying to 'clean up' music. To keep bringing it up is still unbelievable. SHE is the reason everyone is buying all of this crap you hear now because no one can get enough of these awful pathetic songs since they all have 'her' WARNING LABELS' all over them. This has gotten so bad it has caused these really bad artists to lately, make not one bad version of the dirty record but 2 versions so that you can actually get a clean bad record without the smut. Like that is going to change how sucky the record is!!!!!! WASP would've never done this [I'm being sarcastic kiddies, but then they really wouldn't have ever made a clean anything of theirs & they really sucked!].

I personally think there are way better songs like 'this'. That are way more creative, suggestive, exciting & ok dirty, but not too dirty. But have a certain amount of class that doesn't make you feel sick, embarrassed or corrupted, as these other crappy songs do. [Crap is the only perfect word I can think of for these Bad songs, not just bad dirty, bad sucky!] the operative word is 'feel good. Feel good music. If you want to feel good like that if you must, that's ok. But do it right! Also, saying a 'bad' word isn't going to help either. Alanis Morrisette made a killing with this on her 'You Outta Know' record of course. Everyone bought this not just because she was whining but it had the word 'fuck' in it. Who cares? OK no one ever heard that word before in a record but then no one heard it unless you bought the record since it got cut out everywhere. So how were you supposed to know that she said that? You hadda know?? Get real. If you must this word it should make some sense in a song & not just for a sexual reason. In Miss Alanis' case it was completely sexual. In Pink Floyd's case: Not Now John from The Final Cut...the female background singers are clearly heard to be singing 'Fuck all that'! It makes sense, they are making a statement & in no way are speaking of sex. I guess Alanis was making her own statement, don't screw with her or someone else??? OK. Whatever!

Alright, so Alanis isn't Pink Floyd. Why not? Pink Floyd's not dirty either, they're just pissed & really that's all we want. But then we wouldn't mind a little action either. As exampled in their brilliant Young Lust from THE WALL. Back then this might've been considered 'dirty' because the chorus goes 'Oooooooooo I need a dirty woman, I need a dirty gal.'.. yet the way David Gilmour sings that you so wanna get dirty for him. This is a perfect example of a dirty song that's not so dirty. It's fun, it's exciting, it's part of a whole other crazy story but it kicks ass. That is all we want. Yes, I enjoyed songs where I had no idea what they were saying. But at some point you will find out & what you're singing just might shock you. So here are my favorites & my only wish for this very sexy rainy July is that no more bad awful songs come out because you're just going to disappear without a trace.

THE BEST 'DIRTY' SONGS EVER....or 'DO IT' SONGS... [I shall explain their dirtiness for the kiddies... & give warnings where warranted...feel free to send in your list, but watch it, if I hate it & it sucks, I will tell you!]
Smut rating:
A- classy-nothing bad B/C/D- slighly smutty E/F-watch it....smutty

1. LET'S DO IT AGAIN-STAPLE SINGERS: Rating: C
Now this song has just the coolest romantic vibe about it, yet you clearly understand what it's about, if you can understand what Mavis Staples is saying at all. If the fact that her Dad coming in & singing this with her doesn't creep you out, then this is a really cool song to get romantic to.

2. DOWN THE NILE-HEART: Rating-A
Wow, just the way she sings it, it should be banned. But the fantastic way Ann Wilson just screams 'I ain't ever been here before'... is just brutal..nothing smutty about it just exciting as hell. Very classy. It just feels dirty!

3. SLOW HAND-POINTER SISTERS: Rating-A
This song is as dirty as is gets but it's listenable. Just beautiful.

4. A BIG HURT-TIN MACHINE : Rating-D
David Bowie put the loudest greatest band ever together & just released the loudest wildest songs ever. Just loud fun! The dude's perspective.

5. SEX [I'M A....]-BERLIN: Rating-D/E
This song has Terri Nunn & her co-hort losing their minds to the point of making noises people, but it's not so bad! So be warned, she names just about everything in the book she could possibly be to this man to turn him on. A slut, a bitch, bi...etc... & what does he say he is? A man... big deal right? It's quite vicious, especially the live version.

6. DO YOU WANNA TOUCH ME [OH YEAH]-JOAN JETT & BLACKHEARTS: Rating C
Her version is much more satisfying than hearing a convicted molester sing it. It just rocks!

7. THE SENSUAL WORLD-KATE BUSH: Rating B
This song is so classy it's ridiculous. Another romantic wild song.

8.FEEL LIKE MAKIN' LOVE-BAD COMPANY/QUEEN + PAUL RODGERS: Rating B-Bad Co / Rating D-Queen
Now what do you think he wants?? SO what, it's a beautiful song by Bad Company, very classy, till Queen got a hold of it, then just made it dirtier. WOW!

9. OBSESSION-ANIMOTION : Rating B
Everyone knows this song, its fun, its sick, if you really think about it. They're obsessed with each other, but the music kicks.

10. NASTY GIRL-VANITY: Rating: F
Ok this is mega-dirty if you get it...if you can hear the short version you won't get so sick, it's just so funny & bad it's hilarious...

Honorable Mentions:
Dedication-Lita Ford: Rating C
Flesh For Fantasy-Billy Idol: Rating E
Love Token-Brian May: Rating D
In The Bush-Musique: Rating F
X Offender-Blondie: Rating C
Physical-Olivia Newton John: Rating C
Sometimes A Fantasy-Billy Joel: Rating C

Have a good summer whenever it comes.........in the meantime have as much fun as you can in the rain.......

Rozzie.............

MAY....HEY....BEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!

It's May. My month! Yes, I'm a Taurus, yes I had a birthday & it's boring one [not as exciting as it'll be next year] but it's ok. I did have a blast got almost everything I wanted, may-be!. I went to my favorite restaurant with the love of my life, I got to bet on the Kentucky Derby, even though I lost & the Yanks started to go crazy & all of a sudden, I started to think of all the things I've missed & been missing [is that the same thing?]. I missed a few good shows, but then a few other good shows are coming up. I miss real rotary phones [I don't have a cell phone & will never get one ], real typerwriters [the way I always used to pronounce it], real TV, instead of this fake crap, also real tube TVs [they were much cheaper,kids!] real magazines, [which don't seem to exist anymore, they've apparently shrunk-by the way, how is it that the TV Guide got larger & Rolling Stone got smaller??? syk!]. I miss real mail, even though I still get crap somehow, real cameras, cassettes & vhs which I still have. I miss Crystal Pepsi, which was fantastic, who knows what they've done to it now. I miss real jamming, which isn't happening much anymore with all the good rock clubs closing.
I miss real musicians, which there doesn't seem to be a whole lot left. I miss real bands, who are all completely unreal now. I miss going to an arcades, which are completely gone with the exception of a casino [???].

There are alot of things I miss, that have passed me by but still seem to be around. Real newsmen & women, even though I never watched the news [now they all look like Betty dolls!], just people you knew were there even if you missed them. I missed real sports & real announcers, which voices of men that would make you shiver!! I was a sports girl, always was, not basketball or football, but any kind of racing & ball, may-be even a little tennis, especially when crazy John McEnroe [who's married to cooly Miss Scandal: Patty Smyth now] was always pissed off. I missed real baseball, real players who cared about the game & nothing else. Even the Olympics used to be fun to watch [now they're a damn sideshow!], then the steroids & the money grubbers started taking over not just for that but every sport, especially baseball, so I stopped watching, listening, caring, sort of.....

Then something strange & weird happened. They closed Yankee Stadium & opened a new one. Suddenly I wanted to care again, except I didn't know about who or why, but I did. Mostly for the memories, I got to go to the old stadium before they shut it down. Now it's still up but waiting demolition. But there's a new one up & it's actually very beautiful. Since I never went to the old 'older' stadium before they fixed it into 'my' stadium, it's actually kind of cool to see this one look like the old one I never went to before it's old face lift. Confusing?? I started going to Yankee Stadium in the 80s I guess. [weird thing to say....from what I remember]. I love the Yankees, always have , but I got sick of them, because they made it sickening, I'm not even sure I remember why. Maybe the strike in 1994, the year there was no World Series whatsoever, maybe these steroid filled bums thinking they can play baseball with a straight face & call themselves players. I don't remember at all.

I do remember going to Old Timer's Day whenever possible. I don't remember the last time I cared about them winning.
I remember the Yankees winning the World Series against the Mets in 2000. I remember going to Shea [which is also unfortunately gone now too...] to buy goodies from them because I didn't want to forget the only time that possibly could've ever happened. Before & after that everything was a blur. Yet this year I wanted to care, I tried. They still had some Yanks I wasn't interested in but there was something about the new place I need to see & be there for. It began last year & I went on the only day I go, Old Timer's Day. It was a blast like always. I miss the old no-hitters, perfect games that happened in the 90s & '00's, but I always got reports from my uncle & mom. Did they win??? Yes! ok....next day...did they win??? No!. oh ok....next month... Did they make the playoffs??? Yeah! are they in the World Series?? NO! What???????? Since when??? Since 2000??? No way?? They lost one to the Red Sox?? Nah, not my Yankees. Those aren't my classic Yanks. I used to name all the Yanks, now I hardly knew who they were.

I did see the game Dave Righetti pitched a no-hitter, I saw Jim Abbott's no hitter, I saw Aaron Boone's crazy last inning home-run, in between, I didn't care. Yet I started slowly coming back, but I heard stupidity: Red Sox were joining the Yanks, ugh!, they're trading good players, they're buying idiots who aren't doing anything, the manager is sleeping, they haven't been kickin' it. Big-deal, are they winning? OK, are they still fighting?? Looks like! Then the YES Network. In my world, the Yes network meant I thought I'd be watching the progressive band Yes for 24 hours a day, which probably would have been so bad, if they were still in the 80s. Even if they were still together, my Yes!, wow, they got a channel? Cool!
But nah, that's not my Yes, not the Cinema Yes!!No way! Not my 90125 Yes or Drama Yes. The Yankees Yes??? Does that make any sense???

So the Yes Network comes & starts showing not only the new games but the old games as well. Wow. Even games I was at, games I never saw, games I couldn't believe I missed. Will it make me like the Yanks again, may-be! I didn't like the 'new' ['new' meaning 90s & 00s Yanks] Yanks & had no idea how loyal they were. Still I saw some good stuff, cut to 2008, they close MY stadium? No way? Not my stadium! Then MLB Network! AHHHHHHH!

I see they bought new players, who are going to bring the Yanks back. From what? THESE ARE THE YANKS!!!! They didn't even make the playoffs, but I wound up watching those games anyway. Then I realized what I was missing. I missed Lou Pinella & Bobby Murcer. I missed MY old Yankees, cute Gene Michael, Bucky Dent, Graig Nettles & crazy Billy Martin, kicking dirt onto the umpire's pants. I missed the fun I used to have screaming at these lunatics to win. I missed my uncle taking me to the games. I missed him taking me to Old Timer's day & telling me about all the Old Timer's he remembered & I never knew. I missed him telling me how cool Tom Tresh was & Mel Stottlemyer was the best ever. I missed asking who's that? in the old timers intros & he'd instantly knew who they were, their number what they did & when he saw them. Amazing. I missed the old sports days of baseball crazy fun. I totally miss my Uncle more than anything! Everything I knew up until then was gone & nothing was the same.

Yet now I seem to be having almost as much fun as I did back then. I'm fighting with my best friend about which Yankees are real! I'm watching the games like there's no tomorrow. These new 'Newer' Yanks are the coolest ever, especially one called AJ Burnett, who happens to be my nu favorite! He looks so crazy & psycho & is totally making them fight & fun again, like they used to be. Something I thought was missing for a very long time. So everything is new again, in not such a bad way. For years I hated everything new & it was never for any good. But now the Yankees are back & more exciting than ever & there's a part of me which I thought I lost that I think is now back too & I like it. Except my stadium is almost gone & like I said before, maybe my uncle wants it for himself, so I'll give him that.

DOUBLE BLEECH!!...APRIL DORKS!!. MARCH MADNESS???........

March came & went, not without incident. But for this month's Double Bleech, I decided to start with April since it's here already. Finally, Easter was on time, still a bit early but just as well. More confusion, more 'setting the clock back' stupidity & messing with Mama Nature [who's getting really pissed already!, especially since it's her BEarth Day!!! ], just craziness. Baseball was back in the form of the World Baseball Classic which was the craziest thing I'd ever seen in my life [in March] & I love baseball & 2 new stadiums opened in NY [& everywhere else...but who cares! I'm a NYker!!] in April. Trying to get in there was probably the harder than travelling to the World Classic itself. Ticketscummers are crawling in their spew just hoping to take us down with them & losing which is a good thing to find out that we're just not going to take their crap anymore. And despite it being unusually quiet, Happy Bunny has given me the greatest Easter of my life!!! < style="font-weight: bold;">John Cougar [ I will never call him Mellencrap, its too easy!!!]. Still the gods of TV have decided to completely annoy us more with a show based on what 'they' call [who??? dammit because they need to be shot!!] an older woman looking to date a kid!!! That in itself is a double bleech for me. OK, so maybe I'm near that age [although I'm not quite sure what their cut-off cougar date is but I don't really want to for any reason], but never have I ever, nor will I ever want or aspire to be even seen near a child unless it is under 5 years old & in no way will I want to date it [& you cougars will realize they are only 5 years old anyway...]!!!!

The ladys are out, they are free, they're independent & can see & choose whom they want. Fine. But mercy! How young do you want to go? Mind you, I will never watch this show & I don't even want to know, but if there isn't a kid over 25, there is no point. Don't you ladys realize men don't become men till at least 40 & don't even get brains till maybe 35 & I'm trying to being nice, which is not my best trait & is not what this bleech is for. 1st of all, ladys, do you really want to be teachers? I don't. I only do in music, nothing else. If you have to mold your little boy into shape fine, but its not a sport I feel like taking on. I'm sure it'll be massively fun for you, then when you hit the age they realize they will be disturbed by no matter how hot you look, they will take their education elsewhere, if need be. There is a reason we're not all still in kindergarden. [Ugh, the thought....bleech, bleech....bleech..]

2nd: If you want a serious relationship & are truly looking for a mature kid [do those 2 words even go together?], Good luck! I have nothing to say about that. I have yet to meet a mature kid, except maybe hackers. But then that's is so what I'm not looking for [in their language]. 3rd: Language!!! OK maybe he'll make you feel young, but do you reallly want to listen to High School Musical for the rest of your life?????????? Will that be a 'Classic' in 20 years? Can you share that while walking him home from the prom? You'll start talking that way & Twittering, ugh! Do you realize this is illegal in some states??????????? I guess not anymore....I'd up the age limit on that! If you're not careful you'll wind up with someone like Matthew McConauhey & he's not even 40 yet, get my drift [loon]!

Ladys, Cougars, whatever the hell you call yourselves. There are as of this writing, amazing available much more mature men than you realize. If you think this may be your last resort. Please reconsider. Mel Gibson is getting divorced. Hello??? He's gorgeous, older & psycho, what more could you want??? Harrison Ford! He's still not married, so there still may be a chance [besides, how can he possibly find that girl he's with now when she's so tiny?] Alan Rickman, Bill Nighy, need I go on???? Men are where it's at. Real men!!! Believe me they still have something left!

Crazy controversial topic I know [big deal!], but it's funny. If you cougars want to be draggin your boy toy around by a leash watvhing American Idol, that's ok, I need a little more action in my life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


MARCH MADNESS......

March is Women's History Month & they did it again. With the announcement that little Dakota Fanning will be playing wet & wild Cherie Currie in the new movie about the female rock band the Runaways.

OK, so I guess the premise is that she is the right age for the role, since Cherie herself was 16 when they hit. Yet we have yet to see this little actress really show herself. Dakota has done amazing things & she seems to have the talent to play this role. This may be a very challenging since she is going to have to 'do mounds of cocaine', 'sing', 'sleep with almost everyone in sight' & 'get clean' all tasks for Oscar actresses. Depending if the writers of the movie get this right.

Miss 'Twilight' is going to play Joan Jett. We have no idea who they will get for Lita Ford, Jackie Fox & the great powerhouse Sandy West. Yet let's make this clear. The movie is about & based on Cherie's book 'Neon Angels' so basically it's about her & not just the Runaways. But I'm putting my votes in for who I'd like to see play the rest of the 3 since it hasn't been announced & since age may be a factor, all of a sudden [remember kiddies: Olivia Newton John was 30 years old when she played 16 year old Sandy Olsen]

Yes, I'm going to say it. I want Miley Cyrus & Hilary Duff to play Lita Ford & Sandy West. Either Or!!!!!! They're both blonde, young, & wanna be crazy. I'm actually casting Miley to be Sandy since she's a giant. It could be the out she's looking for, since we all know she wants to be crazy. Who knows how Dakota will take on Cherie, but Lita & Sandy? That would be insane & quite fun.

I'd like to see Eliza Dushku or Mena Suvari for Jackie. I don't care how old they are. They both should be Joan Jett as well. But that's already gone. it would be an interesting cast. I think Malcolm McDowell should play scumbag Kim Fowley. he's sort of a dead ringer & would be quite scary. I just can't imagine how crazy this movie will be but I can't wait. Should we cast the GO-GO'S movie yet??? [this was supposed to happen already but no one knows what happened to that].
I would also hope they put a good REAL band together for this & that these girls make the effort to learn their instruments instead of just play-synching. But that is just a dream isn't it???? This is my only hope!!!

That really wasn't the big March story but it is interesting. Movies aren't what they used to be. Yet what they're doing now is outrageous. Let's hope we get more good rock movies. This one takes the cake!!

xoxxoxooxRozzie
see ya in May-Maybe......

UP YOUR DATE!

How was everyone's Valentine? We know not everyone had a good one now don't we. How amazing that everyone seems to think some people will change & become all nice because we have someone new in that White House. Now when we'd all like to believe that's true, some of us know that something's are forever going to stay the same. We unfortunately know the real truth & is some things will just never change unless viciously provoked. You never know.

That brings me to my bleech topic today. There are things still enormously popular these days besides being increasingly annoying. Who knows why. Yet until the president decides to outlaw these things, everything that is out there, which is entertainingly bad will continue to delight an audience by whom we'll never quite understand is coming from.
Which brings me to 2 of the most enjoyed subjects as of late: copycatting & over hyping!

Also, when did February suddenly get popular? Wasn't this thought of as a boring month as well especially since it's so short? Well, I guess not, now it's awards month. Everything crazy that could've happened for the entire year to be talked about next year, happened all in this month. Recap:

Seems that Miss [or Ms. whatever] Britney has a dirty new song some idiots can't figure out, So she decides to cover it up by making a goody-goody video of herself being a normal housewife...[????]. Just so that we're clear & if anyone cares, this has been done before. There are apparently not one but 2 songs by actual rock bands called If You Seek Amy [actually if you want to get technical: If You See Kay Tonight-Brewers Droop-1972; If You See Kay-April Wine-1982. Who knows if it's supposed to mean the same thing. If it does so what?] [I know there's more especially with the same exact title, but my brain is drowning in crap right now to remember...]
What bugs me is the video. It's almost a clone Lita Ford's
Gotta Let Go

video, which has heavy metal guitar lady Lita
[wearing the coolest leather outfit ever! actually the one in Out For Blood is even better! you got nothing on her Brit-screw your red plastic outfit!] being a housewife [hilarious]. So did she rip off 2 classic rock bands that no one cares about? Did she use this little 4 words [or letters...] to make her big comeback? It's been done but of course no one has seen anything like this before & they're so freaked. So this is what brought her back, maybe she'll go away quicker.

Octo-bore mom. Why do we care about this woman. Why do we care about her kids? There are a million mothers who have 10,000 children in Harlem that no one gives a crap about. Can we get off of this one already?

Can I ask who can swim massively while on weed???
& who can do anything while on steroids? Need I say more?
Haven't we been here before??

Now Paula Abdul not only has someone trying to out annoy her [the awful Platinum Weird annoying co-judge-yep that was her, yuk!], she has the unmitigated gall to tell an Osmond how he should sing. This has to be by far the funniest thing ever. Imagine my shock at not only seeing an Osmond on that show, but having her tell him he should think about how to sing solo as opposed to harmonizing as he's used to with his family.??????? EXCUSE ME?????????? 1st of all HE'S AN OSMOND! THEY GROW ON TREES IN UTAH! SINGING IS IN THEIR DNA! This has happened before when she swears she could tell someone how to sing when she doesn't squeal herself.
I don't care if you're not an Osmond fan, those kids can sing almost better than anyone & Ms. Abdul is going to tell them how it's done? I don't think so. That poor kid. What was he doing up there anyway? HE'S AN OSMOND!! He must've wanted to see how bad singers live. He doesn't have to worry, especially since he got kicked out by the 2nd show, which was pathetic, because he probably was the only real singer they'll ever have. Good for him, he didn't have to put up with any idle embarrassment.

Wow, I've never seen a more action-packed depressing Grammys in my life. Of course, Robert Plant was going to win [which was amazing]. Of course Alison Krauss was going to tie the most wins. Of course, everyone who won was dead. Of course, this has happened before when they give the big awards to artists which actual talent! Of course Al Green was going to be perfect going on at the last minute. Of course, dorkhead Timberlake was going to try to out sing Al Green, which of course was a joke [if I were Al I would've pounded on that kid till he kept quiet for messing up his song!] Hello, he's a Reverend 1st of all! He could preach to a church at the last minute & it would be the most amazing thing you'll ever hear in your life. Of course Chris Brown was going to beat up Rhianna, who didn't see that coming, like not having them on the show was such a big loss.

OK, so Peter Gabriel didn't win an Oscar for his awesome Down To Earth song from my personal favorite movie of last year Wall-E . Yet you're still going to tell him he can only sing his song for 65 seconds?? PETER GABRIEL ?? 65 seconds??? Did they know he used to be in Genesis??
A band who doen't even know the meaning of what 65 seconds is supposed to be. It was a miracle if any of their songs were 65 minutes. And as with all legendary classic true artists, what did Peter do? He told them !@#$%^&*(! & he wouldn't play. That's the spirit!! You really are a true legend Peter! Too bad he had to see his song butchered by a bad Legend.
Yes, this has happened before to Phil Collins believe it or not. When he lost the Oscar he should've gotten for Against All Odds [Take A Look At Me Now] in 1984. Not only did they not let him perform the song at all [they didn't even offer 65 seconds], they had a performance dance to the entire song sung by someone else : Ann Reinking [who was incredible in All That Jazz but not that night!] who had absolutely nothing to do with that film whatsoever. Buncha weirdos!

So the Wurm does turn [get it? Starship Trooper? Part 3?]. Yes I know. Keep the letters coming. I don't care, it's what I want.
Recap: Yes singer Jon Anderson becomes so horribly ill he can't tour. What does the band do? Get another singer from a tribute band & forget about him, fine. Then what happens?
Band cancels tour because bassist becomes ill. Well? Where the tribute replacement for Chris Squire huh?? It should happen but never will. He's the one guy you can't replace or won't let be replaced..... Ask Jon himself, He tried it on ABWH in 1989. It wasn't Yes, he couldn't use the name but he needed a bass & got jazz great Jeff Berlin. Yes, Jeff is one of the greatest bassists in the world, but he's no Chris. WOW, who won this?

Yes the past comes back to haunt one doesn't it. Pretty sick don't you think? I'm impressed though. Have we learned anything from this? Of course not. No one seems to care about the past anymore but once it happens again, we say oh I remember that. Deja vu? Copycat? Over hyped? Whatever! And you wish you were back when no one was whining about bad singers & having to put up with the most annoying celebrity on TV every second. Oh wait, that's still happening isn't it? When will we ever learn?

until next time..........Rozzzzie............

SHOCKERS ALREADY??? NO!

Happy New Year kiddies. Gee, the year has hardly started & the month is barely over yet so much has gone on already, it's hard to believe. A month where nothing usually happens it seem January is taking back it's crown!! No longer will January be the boring month where nothing gets done & it's the 'after holiday wind down'. NOPE! Jan seems to be kicking ass & not just because of a new prez, but because Jan isn't going to put up with being a wussy little month anymore. The egos have been flying & it takes just these very loons to give us hope for the future & wish their careers a slow terrifying death. [By the way, welcome back Happy Bunny!]

It has also come to my attention that no one wants to make jokes anymore. Ok, Bush wasn't the best President in the world but he gave us 8 years of maybe some of the craziest jokes in the world. Even though he shouldn't have because he was a President, he's gone now, we have a new one & we can't make fun of him or anything ever again. There'a a special called Make Me Laugh on PBS which is wonderful & quite interesting. It shows the history of laughter. Despite bad times, bad press, bad jokes & bad people there's always something or someone to make you laugh or to laugh at, to just try to make someone else happy or laugh. That's all it is. People can change, grown up, get older & not laugh & that's sad. No one should have to live like that & if that's all we have to this life, it's better to laugh at a bad joke than not laugh at all. It's not meant to hurt anybody, just their egos & if they can't take it, who cares! :

.........The 'Old First Daughters' decided to write a letter to the 'New' First daughters as a word of advice. Are they kidding????.........

............David Coverdale [hopefully of the new Led Zep] is an American citizen. This is completely shocking........

.......4 of the greatest classical musicians in the world finger-synched their way through a freezing Inauguration introduction performance of genius John Williams' song whose melody almost resembled that of the classic rock Grammy winning instrumental Cinema by Yes. Send us back to the Stone Age why don't you!! I can't imagine what's worse: feeling you can't play your instrument for fear that it will go off tune in public like so many other musicians in the world have done under normal circumstances & sounded awful [believe me-no one would have cared, if you did you'd be complaining about every bad musician out there right now who is playing a bad note!] , or the public not realizing that the song sounded like Yes. [Note: People are complaining about musicians 'lip-synching'....now who's saying 'get a life'?????].........

........The Latin couple of last year who just had twins is breaking up, no one saw that coming. Oh so shocking! [?] Maybe she'll let him eat again, since he's been looking so bleak. Don't worry, maybe their deadbeat entourage's bodyguard's best friend's date who watches their furs will get custody of the twins. Then the poor kids will have a decent future!........

..........Oh, poor Dark Knight didn't get nominated for any 'big' Oscars. Are you kidding?? It's a cartoon!!! Well it was. But it's not an Oscar contender by any means. Can we get that straight?? And do you really think, that poor boy wants the Joker to be the last thing people remember him by???? I don't think so........

..........Bruce Springsteen didn't get an Oscar nomination for Best Song!! Maybe now someone cool will get it! Like Peter Gabriel! [Also, am the only one who wants to see Wall-E get Best Screenplay??,& besides Wall-E, House Bunny was the best movie of last year!].........

..........Amy Winehouse's husband [?] wants to divorce her. Are you kidding??????????? He was only in jail for a year.........

.........The prosecution finally rested in the Phil Spector trial. Can this really be taking this long?????? Are you kidding????.........

That seems to be the big news of the new year, if you count this prez jazz. Yet this seems to be how this year is going to shape up. Big changes & no matter what, idiots will still be idiots. Let's see how long it will last. I'm going to be revamping my bleech, I'm not sure how, but I hope to have much more interesting & fun things to talk about. So stay close, stay in touch, keep rockin' & don't stop showing your funny side!!!

THANX ! / WHAT A WAY 2 GO!!!! PRE-DICK-SHUNS FOR THE 9S!!!!

WOW, WHAT DID I MISS??? OK, so I forgot to give Thanks to all.... & I swear to you, I have plenty to be thankful for & I will list them all as I lay another & ONE FINAL MASSIVE END-UH-DA-YEEAH DOUBLE SPECTACU-MEGALOYD BLEECH for just ONLY you.....

I didn't think I missed anything since nothing happened or did it???? But in the days during Turkey day, you turkeys!, quite a lotta shit happened & yes I have to use that word so get over it!
Here goes my Thanx for not only y'all who've read my bleech [my followers especially] in the last year but the madness in which I have been able to accomplish this, just when I keep thinking it's going to suck, it just sort of actually kinda works. Thanx....

1st of all: THANX: to HAPPY BUNNY, for not only making these last 2 years complete bliss for me [I have my own yummy bunny that's been keeping me very happy this past year & I'm extremely grateful to no end...] & my bleech, but for adding the touch it needed. Yet since I'm thinking of retiring the cute little thingy from here [boo-hoo! sob! ugh!], I'm not exactly sure how I will continue this without the magic bunny, who has given me nothing but sheer happiness. I luv u Happy Bunny, you're totally Sick & amazing! [Would like help in what to replace it with....]

THANX: to LITA FORD for coming back & still looking amazing & putting on one of the greatest concerts of the year.....& having a Xmas song too. Ultimate. She was what this world was missing! Let's hope the movie about her old band the Runaways does her justice.

THANX: to GUNS 'N' ROSES for biting the big one! We're still not sure who's left, but if Buckethead isn't even there anymore [if only to hear the loon's name, which has to be the all time funniest rock name EVER!], than there shouldn't have been ANY point Axl! Even more sad is getting beat by Kane W.
BONUS POINTS: For Velvet Revolver & Stone Temple Pilots for not being able to figure out who the hell they are, what they are or who they want to be, especially in the band. Wait....aren't they all the same band? Let's just hope Buckethead gets something outta this. Maybe he'll join the Black Velveetas....

THANX: to Jennifer Aniston for taking back the dork who thought he could actually dump her. Idiot! I don't know how she did it, but no other chick would want to handle his boring ass. Maybe if she can really tame him we'll never have to hear his whiny voice again. Ugh...

THANX: To everyone including Paul McCartney, who vehemently protested the 'New Led Zep', which would've been hilarious. This came outta nowhere!
Page & Jones wouldn't have DARED to try that one. I love that they did try. I'm still voting for COVERDALE! Now that should be Zep again if not for a laugh as good as BUCKETHEAD.

THANX: TO THE IMMORTAL QUEEN + PAUL RODGERS FOR COMING BACK!! I will say it for as long as your hands bleed from typing or writing to me telling me I'm insane!! IT WORKS SO BACK OFF!!! The COSMOS ROCKS does ROCK!! GET IT!! AS LONG AS BRIAN MAY & ROGER TAYLOR LIVE TO STILL BE ABLE TO TOUCH THEIR INSTRUMENTS THEY MUST NOT STOP!! You'd rather have George 'toilet jailbird' Michael join??
There are only 3 things wrong with this entire thing: 1: That JOHN DEACON isn't there----PLEEEAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEE COME BACK JOHN!!!!
2: That they even have the gall to do the 'song' "BAD COMPANY' live'. That's just mean. Not only to poor Simon Kirke who is beyond amazing & is the coolest drummer ever, but the fact that it sounds better, since Brian & Roger beat the shit out of that [Feel Like Makin' Love should NEVER EVER be done by Bad Company EVER AGAIN because of this, this song now COMPLETELY BELONGS TO QUEEN !!!!!!! all it needs is JOHN DEACON!! I think I'm gonna faint!!! ] & QUEEN ISN'T BAD COMPANY!! &
3: That BRIAN & ROGER DON"T SING LEAD MORE!!! That's pathetic. The new songs are amazing but if Brian & Roger had some lead time they would sound so much more kickin'. But I will be forever grateful to Paul for keeping my boys together so screw what everyone else says!!! Also Remember kiddies: be glad that they are not Journey, the new Led Zep, the last Judas Priest & the new YES!!! You know they have a lot more class than that! Also they're not called QUEEN OK!!! It's QUEEN +PAUL RODGERS!!! DUMMIES!!!

THANX: To JON ANDERSON for basically kicking Chris Squire's giant ass about HIS YES!!!! Alongside Chris, we all now how tiny Jon is next to him, so for him to have pulled off making the lunatics not go out as Yes after they didn't seem to give a crap that he became extremely ill is just his mystical magic work at its best. All that Yogi stuff paid off big time! Topped off by that beautiful pissed off letter he wrote to everyone was remarkable. You still got it Jon!! That is precision & the way to fight for your band even when you can't!!! Remember kiddies: Jon could've taken the School Of Rock kids out as Yes & THAT WOULD'VE BEEN MORE YES THAN THIS & no one would've said a word!! Not even Chris.

THANX: To the bEAGLES for keeping my new found hatred for them alive. This because on the actually all-cool very country CMA Awards while everyone donned their country outfits looking how they were supposed to, the Eagles, who have forever sounded country & even looked country on their Hell Freezes Over Tour with their classic sexy-ass denim [which pissed me off at the time because I thought they would've dressed up-EVEN THOUGH THEY LOOKED GOOD!! my bad!] look, they go & dress up like tuxedoed corporate lawyers at a meeting that looked like it'd taken place at a music store & just decided to start playing & bring their corporate stock broker dork friends with them in place of Don Felder. [I'm referring to the 2000 loons they had up there playing every instrument the Eagles themselves used to once play...] WHAT THE HELL????????????????????

THANX: To my great friend Ronald Vaughan for trusting me with part of his fantastic archives. I'm beyond honored....

THANX: to SHERYL CROW for making every effort in the world to TRY to get into FLEETWOOD MAC & not succeeding. She still has a chance, if Buckingham decides to keep his big mouth shut. Since her music has become useless to date, it would be good for her to join them, if only to make better music. Let's hope Stevie puts her foot down & takes her, otherwise CHRISTINE PLEASE COME BACK!!

THANX: to Blender Magazine for actually being ok, especially for their lists. When Rolling Stone decided to shrink, they officially went on the bad magazine list, seemingly making Blender become cool, despite who they cover.

THANX: to , TOM JONES & PAUL MCCARTNEY for still being classy after all these years!!!

THANX: to my bud , former writer of Time magazine & one of the most respected authors of all time, for releasing the fiction book BEET about why I never went to college & why it sucks & just being completely insane... It's hilarious & it's coming out on paperback next year [month -whatever you wanna call it] READ IT!! I luv u Roger!.

THANX: BEST CONCERTS OF 8:

BONNIE TYLER-BB KINGS

LITA FORD-BB KINGs

NEIL DIAMOND-MSG

ASIA-Westbury

ALBITA-S.O.B.'S

FLOWER KINGS-HIGHLINE

RINGO STARR & ALL STARRS-RADIO CITY [besides having a horrendous drummer]

CARE BEARS ON FIRE-TRIBECA Y

Happy Eats you Turkeys.....you can never give enough thanx.......
XOXOXOXOXO R

scroll kiddies...there's more........

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WHAT A WAY 2 GO/PRE-DICK-SHUNS 4 THE 9S:

December??? Damn!! When did that get here so fast? I guess at Thanksgiving. Gee. Can you slow down a bit? Complaints, complaints, complaints. That's all I seem to hear about lately, it's sickening. People just love to complain & not do anything about it, or better yet go on until they annoy you to oblivion. So why can't I do the same thing? Isn't that what life's about???
OK so let's send Double -08 out in style & bring in the 9s. Here's to what's happened & what may happen if this world is worth anything.........

MAY HAPPEN: the band Creed is threatening our very existence by getting back together. As with the Led Zep controversy this must NOT HAPPEN! They have forever said they are doing this for the Lord. Now we know this is blatant blasphemy. Since we know God's favorite band is & will always be QUEEN!. SO maybe God will see the good in this not happening & stop this insanity before we hear the crooning of Scott Stapp's drunken onstage preaching.

MAY HAPPEN: PINK FLOYD's respect for their legacy continues, even after the death of their 2 leaders. Yes leaders: Richard Wright & Syd Barrett, the reining Kings of the Floyd are gone so Pink Floyd is gone. Even as they made this constantly clear, everyone wishes they will still tribute them by reuniting in some way. Of course, this is NOT GONNA HAPPEN! But who knows how heartbroken they may be & may actually put on one show for their leaders which would be nice, but nothing more than that. It would be surprising, but no point without that 'evil Ricky sound'. No one should have to duplicate that. The only reason for them to play together again would be of Kate Bush happens to decide to ever tour or play a show again. Now that would be a perfect band for her. That MAY HAPPEN.....you never know.

MAY HAPPEN: GARY MOORE somehow lost a battle of someone accusing him of ripping off a solo. Just a solo no less. Not lyrics, an entire song, or a melody but an ENTIRE SOLO!!! This is the strangest precedent I've ever heard in my life. A song no one ever heard of for one thing, even if they did, Gary Moore is one of the only original guitarists left in this world so there would be no reason in the world for him to rip off anyone, even though all he does is blues music now, yet fantastically. He apparently can appeal this which MAY HAPPEN & must. If not just to save his reputation, which really isn't in danger of being destroyed because he is so amazing & I don't think anyone cares, but for the fact that this can set off a whole chain of events which I admit I personally wouldn't mind seeing. SO that would mean that Oasis can get sued by the Beatles for trying to sound exactly like them, it's still a wonder why they still exist in the 1st place. Or any 80s bad metal band can get sued by Deep Purple's Ian Gillian for all trying to sound exactly like him? Ripping off his sound, right? That is the equivalent of ripping off an exact solo, yes? What I'd give to see all these bad new singers just disappear off the planet by a lawsuit. If it were only that easy. For that, Courtney Love should sue Amy Winehouse for being a bad version of her. Or the Pussycat Dolls for being an absolute slutty version of the Spice Girls. [I have no idea who was before that, the Supremes??] It would be interesting. MAY HAPPEN!!

MAY HAPPEN: The Grammy Nominations were announced. Yes, I wait for this, yes, I'm gonna see it, yes, it's important to see who you don't like LOSE!!!! Not who you like win because that's NOT GONNA HAPPEN!!! BUT!!! In this case there's a lot riding on this one & I'm so going to be right there. I will take wagers from anyone!!! :
1st off: The GILMOUR/RUSH SHOWDOWN!! One of them may win. I believe they were nominated in this same category once before & both lost. But once again Best Rock Instrumental rules with a nomination each for David Gilmour & Rush. A win for them MAY HAPPEN! Because we can't see anyone else here getting this [although they might get creamed with Zappas]. [The fact that Bruce Springsteen who's never done an instrumental in his life, decides to do one last year, gets nominated in that category for the 1st time & wins it because the Grammy people are idiots is just another brain-dead sample of why they can't understand why people hate them! ] So it's time for Gilmour or Rush, doesn't matter, but it would be nice if Gilmour got it, if only to hear him praise Mr. Wright for being on the song, even though he's so not going....you never know....
2nd off: BATTLE OF OLDER VS. OLD: Robert Plant is up for his really cool album with his little girlfriend Country star Allison Krauss. The bEagles are up for their new record. What's the difference??? Robert Plant over the years acquired something called CLASS!!! He is aging gracefully-musically! [looks is a different story] so he's an older elder statesman! Even he is sick of singing his own Zep songs, this makes him cool! Therefore he is being labelled as the Grammys OLD choice to give the Grammy to. This is NOT CORRECT. If the Eagles were up for Album of the Year [which they are NOT THANK GOD!-either way they would lose to Plant] that would be an old choice. Since the Eagles have not acquired the class they so have been trying to achieve since they got rid of their amazing lead guitarist Don Felder. They just made themselves OLD!! Since then they have gone out of their way to try to prove they're still cool, even by trying to stop the release of his awesome tell-all Heaven & Hell. Yes they made a new album, but are aging most ungratefully & therefore are the old choice, nor do they have an iota of class anymore. Robert Plant actually made a good record, a record worth listening to. The Eagles made a record but then took 20 guys out to play it for them. When did they need to take another band out with them to be the Eagles when they were the Eagles? This shows no class. So while the Eagles might win [& unfortunately I still think Frey & Henley are kinda cute...the bums!!!], it MAY HAPPEN!, they are the OLD choice, since there really isn't anyone else in that category anyway to give it to, Plant & Ms. Krauss are the class choice, which means they are taking that show back to the stratosphere.
3rd off: BRITS vs. USA: OK, I've long put on the table that the brits have put out way better music than Americans lately, why is that? It's like Hollywood now. All the American actors in these new cool shows are BRITISH!! Eli Stone, House, Mentalist [Aussie]. Its a fact, being an American has sucked for a very long time, in music & movies. Half the lead awards nominated are from Brits. Not that the records are any good but they aren't very American. Except Robert Plant's. Go figure. Being with his American lady hit that nail, so of course he's going to get that & it won't count. And I long thought that Coldplay & Radiohead were the same Brit band. So all this is going to prove is to get those 2 horrid bands in the same room to prove they're not the same guys..YUK! I know they're both going to lose.....MAY HAPPEN...you never know...

Having said this there is still a whole month left & more stupid things MAY HAPPEN! Yet since the month & the year is almost over Here are my Pre-Dick-Shuns for the year coming as all these other idiots are making their deadbeat idiotic ridiculous predictions for the Nu Year, that I think WILL HAPPEN!!...:

WILL HAPPEN: John Deacon will pull a Duran Roger Taylor move on QUEEN [which will be hilarious considering that their drummers both have the same name] & return to that band after finally getting sick of his home life as Roger of Duran did. Word is that after Sir Duran boy left years ago, singer Simon LeBon called him everyday since asking him to come back to which he replied everytime with a sheer NO! Yet 5 years ago he finally said Yes & has been there since. So there is hope for John Deacon & Queen, he just needs a little more time, if not, one of his kids has got to be able to play bass already....you never know.....

WILL HAPPEN: Whoever's left in Guns'n'Roses, Velvet Revolver & Stone Temple Pilots will do a 3 day tour of Japan & call themselves Talk Show with special guest Buckethead & whatever the hell the Page & Jones call their new boys in tribute to Coverdale/Page!

WILL HAPPEN: Dennis DeYoung, Steve Perry, Peter Cetera & Jon Anderson will do a full out leaders tour & call themselves YES US! :the Dude Divas as in us & for the USA. They will blow their former bands off the charts, tell them where they can Styk it & it will be the most successful tour of the year. Theie band will consist of Simon Kirke on drums, Mark-Younger Smith & Lincoln Brewster on gtr [the 2 geniuses who kicked Steve Stevens [Billy Idol] & Neal Schon [Journey] in their asses!!] with Dennis & Peter on keys & bass respectively, add a couple of extra School of Rock ladys on xtra keys & bass & that would make one sick band.

WILL HAPPEN: Since Joss Stone, Amy Winehouse, Sheryl Crow, Jewel, Duffy & Beyonce have all but destroyed our hopes of hearing any kind of real singing & good songs again, BONNIE TYLER, KIM CARNES, SASS JORDAN, PAT BENATAR & CHER will play an all-out screamfest of a show called the REAL VH1 DIVAS!! & PUT ALL THESE LITTLE BITCHES IN THEIR PLACE!! Guest starring the original country ladys of rock: Grace Slick, Olivia Newton John, Tanya Tucker & Linda Ronstadt plus Joan Osborne & Lisa Marie Presley to the screamfest. Their band will consist of Nancy Wilson & Marcy Detroit Levy on gtr, Suzi Quatro on bass & Toni Tennille & Christine McVie on keys with Moi! on drums..., Gina Schock & maybe Sheila E! They will end with a tribute to the late Laura Branigan & encore with a screeching version of Gloria!! [one can only hope!]

WILL HAPPEN: GENESIS will reunite with Peter Gabriel & Steve Hackett & play the sickest tour ever seen by man. If Phil Collins can get his chops up.

WILL HAPPEN: THE FACES will reunite with 10,000 guests bassists. It's the only way they'll get away with their reunion without late bassist Ronnie Lane. They just better get someone with class!!! I could give them 200 names who are out of work now.

WILL HAPPEN: By FAR!!!! The best story of the year, I don't care what happened to who or what president we got, Nothing!! Compares!!! TO!!! the ARETHA/TINA BATTLE!!!
Can you believe this??? There is no story in the world better than this!!! My vote for the No. 1 2008 Best Headline!!! This is the funniest thing EVER!!! Teeny Tina compared to Giant Aretha.. Is it a Battle of the voices??? No! Is it a Battle of Music??? Not even close!! Is it a battle she said/she ate??? Maybe!! But mercy, this is insane. I'm betting that since these divas have never met [which is completely unbelievable!] & their new music doesn't seem to mean much to anyone lately, that they WILL meet & have a mega-leg showdown. With Tina Turner sashaying her awesome legs around that stage while Aretha has her helpers escort her out with a chicken leg in her hand & scream how she's really the Queen. Then right before it ends Dolly Parton will take them both out with her boobs!! DONE!!!

MINI WILLS:
George Michael will be arrested for toliet training....
Michael Jackson will be arrested for training....
Madonna will be arrested for doing baseball players....
Britney will be arrested for wearing pants......
Axl Rose will be arrested for going on tour......
Paris Hilton will be arrested for speaking [I wish!]
Lindsey Lohan will be arrested for going straight.....
& Motley Crue will be arrested for still being alive.....

Those are my pre-dick shuns....don't forget to watch New Year Rockin' Eve no matter how much it'll suck because Dick Clark will be there once again. It just goes to show you there'll always be a Dick around...


BEST RECORDS of 8:
[even though most qualify for 9, if next year bites, i'll put them on next years also...]
COSMOS ROCKS-QUEEN

HOME AFTER DARK-NEIL DIAMOND

JUST A LITTLE LOVIN'-SHELBY LYNNE

LITTLE WILD ONE-JOAN OSBORNE

LIVE IN GDANSK-DAVID GILMOUR

SORDID LIVES-OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN

VENUS IN OVERDRIVE-RICK SPRINGFIELD

CERTIFIABLE-POLICE

BREAK UP THE CONCRETE-PRETENDERS

GIFT OF SCREWS-LINDSEY BUCKINGHAM

We'll Miss you: RICK WRIGHT, JERRY REED, PAUL NEWMAN, .............


HAPPY NU YEAR!!!
LUV, ROZZZZZZZZZZZZ